Grateful for peaceful time in nature. Drawing on this summer memory. What are you grateful for today? #Gratitude pic.twitter.com/zfHF06fxwk
— Beth Friedman (@TherapistBeth) January 14, 2014
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words
Even in therapy, words can only express so much. Often, it takes an image or a clearly visualized memory to evoke a deeper feeling. I have been using photographs in therapy for many years, asking clients to bring in moments they want to share for our work together. In many ways, this simple exercise can deepen the work and provide powerful meaning about yourself or your relationships to loved ones.In couple's work, I often ask both people to bring in photographs of themselves as children to help their partner feel a deeper sense of empathy for the childhood wound (that deepest fear or unmet desire) that can get triggered during conflicts. I use a variety of approaches with couples, including IMAGO Therapy, which is based on the view that people choose their partners because they are reminded of the positive and also negative characteristics of their parents. This informs their initial attraction and explains the almost immediate sense of connection felt between partners upon meeting. The work for couples often begins after that first phase of the relationship, when the childhood wound gets triggered, and there is a wish to find healing from their partner. Instead, there can be a painful power struggle. Seeing your partner's face as a child in a photograph can help you connect to the deeper love you feel, and release your need to keep up a protective wall. When both partners can feel accepted and loved for their true, genuine selves, positive change occurs.
In individual work, photographs can help reveal true, inner feelings. It is often interesting to note which photographs someone will choose to bring to a session. It offers a window into a person's self-esteem and self-worth, and helps to identify which relationships are most meaningful. Just as in couple's work, viewing a photograph can evoke a greater sense of empathy. In individual work, you can understand your unique perspective in your own world and find a way to be kinder to yourself. We can explore what kind of response you have to seeing yourself and the memories that arise about that time in your life. A photograph can be a catalyst to explore the unconscious and help to verbalize unspoken feelings.
In session, we can come up with a variety of exercises together, creating powerful shared discussions. One client, a professional photographer, had difficulty feeling empathy for herself but easily found it for others, often strangers at events she was photographing. I asked her to take a self-portrait, and we talked about what she saw in her own photograph of herself. Through this exercise, she was able to see herself more generously, looking deep into her own eyes and feeling a new self-awareness. We were then able to begin to explore where some negative patterns began and how she could feel a greater sense of self-worth.
You can start thinking about how to use photographs for self-exploration. Look through some old photographs of yourself. What do you notice about your expression? What do you remember about the day the photo was taken? How did you feel about yourself or a loved one next to you? What was happening in your life at that time? How do you think of yourself now? Try to look back at yourself with kindness and understanding.
If you want to explore this subject further, here is a good resource with links about using photographs therapeutically.
-PhotoTherapy Centre
"Photography, as a powerful medium of expression and communications, offers an infinite variety of perception, interpretation and execution."
-Ansel Adams
Learn more about Beth Friedman's psychotherapy practice at:
ManhattanTherapists.com
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Relaxation Meditation
This is a short clip of a guided relaxation exercise I created. You can listen to the full exercise on my website at:
http://manhattantherapists.startlogic.com//bethfriedman.html
The audio link is available all the way at the bottom of the webpage.
I hope it is relaxing and therapeutic. I'll be adding more guided imageries and relaxation exercises soon. Please let me know what you think. Thanks!
Monday, January 5, 2009
Finding Satisfaction in '09 - Not Just Another Set of New Year's Resolutions
How can this year be the one in which you feel most satisfied about your life?
There is so much turmoil and uncertainty in the world right now, and yet I've been working in my private practice on helping my clients focus on the simple and positive things, finding true meaning for themselves. What gives you true joy, peace, and happiness? You can start asking yourself simple questions, and it can be any time of year, not just when everyone seems to be making resolutions. Simply start by asking yourself what you really want from your life. What gives you true meaning?
When you boil it all down, many people simply want to feel heard and understood. We also need to find balance for ourselves when so many responsibilities and distractions pull us in different directions. As a therapist, I work with people to understand themselves better, and to build positive connections with themselves and others.
As people think more about how to save money, we are seeking simpler ways to feel satisfied, without all the bells and whistles. We're rethinking our approach. Increased satisfaction will come when we think about and make space for what we truly want. Some ways to get the juices flowing and feel better at the same time are:
1) Journal Writing - This can be just random thoughts jotted down while you're on the bus or waiting for a meeting to start. Your mind is actively working and thinking even when you are multi-tasking with a million unrelated tasks. Many of my clients have started keeping a journal. It can help to bring your writing to therapy, too, and share some important observations you've made for yourself while you're in the real world, living your life. I also tell my clients when they're obsessing about a particularly stressful situation, to write about it, and then physically put the journal into a drawer and then close it, literally putting those thoughts away for a while.
2) Yoga and Meditation - I have recently started to do yoga/pilates and morning meditation myself. As someone who had not thought these techniques would work for me, I am the most happily surprised at how much I love yoga. I've been doing a 5-minute meditation every morning, too, and it's incredibly relaxing and helps me start my day more clearly. With my degree in public health, I am always thinking about my client's physical health, too, and meditation has been proven to help your body achieve a "relaxation response," which can help diminish feelings of anxiety and distress.
3) Eating right - This can be a tough one for many people, especially when how we eat stems from patterns that started when we were younger. Through therapy, you can figure out your own personal triggers that can cause self-sabotage, or blocks that prevent you from taking care of yourself. Eating right is really less about dieting than about confidence and self-worth. You deserve to fuel your body with healthy foods that keep you going strong.
4) Connecting with our loved ones and friends - Nothing makes us feel better than feeling understood and connected to someone else. Our friends and loved ones can help us tap into strong positive feelings about ourselves, through laughter and joy. My clients find their therapy sessions as a good way to connect with themselves, making time to think about their own patterns and inner strengths. Therapy can help you feel more refreshed and peaceful about your life because you're working on making positive changes for yourself and working to improve your relationships with important people in your life.
I look forward to sharing more Therapeutic Reflections with you in the coming months. May you find more balance and satisfaction this year and moving forward.
Beth
There is so much turmoil and uncertainty in the world right now, and yet I've been working in my private practice on helping my clients focus on the simple and positive things, finding true meaning for themselves. What gives you true joy, peace, and happiness? You can start asking yourself simple questions, and it can be any time of year, not just when everyone seems to be making resolutions. Simply start by asking yourself what you really want from your life. What gives you true meaning?
When you boil it all down, many people simply want to feel heard and understood. We also need to find balance for ourselves when so many responsibilities and distractions pull us in different directions. As a therapist, I work with people to understand themselves better, and to build positive connections with themselves and others.
As people think more about how to save money, we are seeking simpler ways to feel satisfied, without all the bells and whistles. We're rethinking our approach. Increased satisfaction will come when we think about and make space for what we truly want. Some ways to get the juices flowing and feel better at the same time are:
1) Journal Writing - This can be just random thoughts jotted down while you're on the bus or waiting for a meeting to start. Your mind is actively working and thinking even when you are multi-tasking with a million unrelated tasks. Many of my clients have started keeping a journal. It can help to bring your writing to therapy, too, and share some important observations you've made for yourself while you're in the real world, living your life. I also tell my clients when they're obsessing about a particularly stressful situation, to write about it, and then physically put the journal into a drawer and then close it, literally putting those thoughts away for a while.
2) Yoga and Meditation - I have recently started to do yoga/pilates and morning meditation myself. As someone who had not thought these techniques would work for me, I am the most happily surprised at how much I love yoga. I've been doing a 5-minute meditation every morning, too, and it's incredibly relaxing and helps me start my day more clearly. With my degree in public health, I am always thinking about my client's physical health, too, and meditation has been proven to help your body achieve a "relaxation response," which can help diminish feelings of anxiety and distress.
3) Eating right - This can be a tough one for many people, especially when how we eat stems from patterns that started when we were younger. Through therapy, you can figure out your own personal triggers that can cause self-sabotage, or blocks that prevent you from taking care of yourself. Eating right is really less about dieting than about confidence and self-worth. You deserve to fuel your body with healthy foods that keep you going strong.
4) Connecting with our loved ones and friends - Nothing makes us feel better than feeling understood and connected to someone else. Our friends and loved ones can help us tap into strong positive feelings about ourselves, through laughter and joy. My clients find their therapy sessions as a good way to connect with themselves, making time to think about their own patterns and inner strengths. Therapy can help you feel more refreshed and peaceful about your life because you're working on making positive changes for yourself and working to improve your relationships with important people in your life.
I look forward to sharing more Therapeutic Reflections with you in the coming months. May you find more balance and satisfaction this year and moving forward.
Beth
Welcome to 2009!
Greetings and welcome to my blog. Thank you for your interest. For the new year, I hope to help you find balance and joy in your life. Please check back here for my first posted article.
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